Don't Know What I Want to Do

I have only attended two full days of high school and I am already considering alternatives.

Let me just say, it sucks when you don't get classes with friends. I've never had amazing luck with that, but it still really, really sucks. It wouldn't suck as bad if it was a class full of strangers, oh no. It's a class full of people who you know but who don't really care for your existence, and frankly you don't care for theirs either. So you sit at the edge of the row in front of this pseudo rapper kid who actually has tattoos and a SON and you wonder what he's doing here anyway.

You know that feeling?

It's awkward.

I only see my handful of friends during lunch period, and most of them steal my food anyway. I get to talk to my guy-friend (I'll think of a name for him later) on the short bus ride to the elementary, though. Which rocks. I don't really hang out with my brother all that much because he likes to associate himself with stoners and potential criminals and I do not care to be around them all that much if I can help it. So it really sucks.

My mom said I could do online schooling if this year didn't go that well... but do I seriously want to do that? I mean, I spend quite a bit of time on the computer in my free time, so after my online lessons my eyes will look like

And that's not very attractive. And I'd have to do it at the same time my seminary teacher was there for her kid, and I don't like that woman. Also, I might get into the habit of not bothering to dress up. And I like dressing up and people seeing me all dressed up in what awesome clothes I have. Which brings up another point, what social life I have will dwindle and dwindle until it is nonexistent. And that would suck a whole lot.

I want to go to the school Rapunzel is going to, which is at the community college and is all awesome and classes start at 9:20 PM. It's a twenty minute drive, though. And there are literally only accepting 20 kids in each grade, though apparently a lot of people drop out. But once again, that limits my chances of not being socially retarded, even though it's pretty bad now with no friends in my classes and what not.

And I'm not racist or anything, but there are like 10 white people there. And I'm not shallow or anything, but you know... I need to get a boyfriend at one point or another and I prefer white guys...

And it's sorta in the capital of the state, and a large part of the capital is "in dah hood, yo."

This is a hilarious yet lame mental image for me considering Rapunzel is a fairy-like, semi-goth girl with dark eyeliner and frills and straight As and super nice but has a dark side WHICH IS EVIL and has very very very long hair. Yeah.

So it's like, an exclusive place right by the ghetto. Even though I hear there's some pretty dumb people in there. But they have a gift shop. A gift shop. THAT. IS JUST. AWESOME.

Dunno if I'd be able to get used to going to only four classes a day and getting home later, though. It still sounds pretty awesome.

I just don't know if I am going to live through this year, though. I just don't know.

In any case, it's the weekend, and I am exhausted. God knows how I'm going to live through a full week of school with classwork and everything. I think I just might die.

Again.